Many people may think social media is tearing us apart by causing social isolation and a disconnect outside of the digital world. However, social media is not the direct cause of social isolation. While social media involves a connection online and thus disengagement with the outside world, the root of the problem lies not within social media itself, but instead, with us individuals. Social media has the power to connect or disconnect, create or destroy, but it is ultimately up to us to determine the way in which we use it; for our own personal benefit or detriment. Individual choices we make to either surrender to social media’s ability to control our lives or use it in a way that is beneficial to our own personal advantage relies solely on our own personal dependence and decisions. Scott MacKillop explains in “Social Impacts of Digital Media” that “as with all tools, social media is not inherently good or bad. The choice to use it productively or destructively lies within us”.  The real problem with social media precipitates from our own habits and decisions based on how frequently we choose to occupy the web. Ultimately, social media is an alternative form of social contact and lives up to its main purpose of fostering an environment of connectedness which is successfully bringing people together, however, our own personal decisions to use it in a destructive way is causing our society to be torn apart as a whole.

Social media and social networking connect people together by changing the way in which we interact, while also dispensing feelings that are otherwise associated with social exclusion in the outside world. Constant pressures to fit in and feel a sense of belonging cause people to turn to social media in order to compensate for the lack of interaction in reality.

In order to feel a sense of belonging and connectedness, “low esteemed individuals are typically more frequently involved with their mobile device”. The Bergen Social Media Addiction Scale applied to a group of target college students determined types of people who use social media, how often and why. It was concluded, “individuals with the lowest self-esteem levels and highest levels of depression spent the most time on social media”. On the surface, these social media habits among certain adolescents could be considered problematic, or even addictive, however, the low self-esteemed individuals who are most frequently using their device for social media should be considered as they are merely searching for belongingness and connectedness. Since social media facilitates a supportive, interactive environment of connectedness and belonging, these low esteemed individuals are using digital media as an opportunity to participate in distant social communities.  By posting and sharing personal experiences in the format of photos and videos, people build relationships, communicate, and interact with distant friends and strangers, while “being reminded of one’s social connectedness online.  Thus verifying social media is a beneficial way to mitigate feelings of exclusion in reality through alternative social contact. Social media’s ability to form new relationships, uphold existing affiliations, encourage positive socialization, and overall existence as an open platform for personal expression and opinion is beneficial in bringing people together, especially those struggling with belongingness outside the digital world. Online connection and interaction through digital networking on social media platforms like Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, can dispense feelings that are otherwise associated with social exclusion. Those who feel isolation or loneliness, “benefit from feeling more socially included through participation in online social communities” (Knausenberger).  Knausenberger’s research study concluded that reminders of social connectedness, such as Facebook notifications and reminders, “dispense with using other means of restoring a sense of social connectedness” (Knausenberger).  

The rise of social media and new technological advancements that allow instant video recording and sharing have a great effect on social interaction and widespread distribution. Social media platforms like Snapchat and Instagram “lead to a greater impact on the strength of the relationship on social interaction” and contribute to a new alarming disorder known as the Fear of Missing Out (FOMO). The ability to instantly share a photo or a video contributes to FOMO which is a comorbidity associated with Internet addiction. There is a correlation between adolescents’ fear of missing out as well as a need to belong, which drives the need for popularity on social media. Instant photo and video sharing on social media platforms like Snapchat, Instagram and Facebook increase pressure for teens to publicize and broadcast their lives on these outlets so that they do not feel left out. Often FOMO and the opportunity to post a picture on social media is one of the main reasons someone will attend an event, go to a party, or participate in something spontaneous or considered “post worthy”. Often I will hear the phrase, “If you don’t post it on Instagram, did it actually happen”? Posting pictures and videos on social media emphasizes the important role that FOMO plays on adolescents’ media use and well-being.  Increased FOMO is associated with increased stress related Facebook use. Experiments and studies using the structural equation model confirmed that an “increased need to belong and an increased need for popularity were associated with an increased use of Facebook”; these relationships were mediated by FOMO. Internet addiction is widely prevalent among adolescents (40%) and it is strongly associated with FOMO. “Among the Internet addicts, 37% have FOMO whereas, in 24% of the subjects, FOMO exists alone without IA”.

While social media can be very beneficial for those with lower self-esteem by producing alternative feelings of inclusiveness, the fear of missing out and internet addiction is a direct example of how social media can become an issue when we give it the power to control our lives.